BigJokeBook Latest and Greatest Jokes http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk Latest and Greatest Jokes from BigJokeBook.co.uk en-gb Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:24:11 GMT Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:24:11 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk 18a Productions jokes@bigjokebook.co.uk (MyPetTrade) support@18aproductions.co.uk (18a Productions) 10 A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW. "Officer, look what they've done to my Beemer!" he whined. "You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!" said the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!" http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Fri, 13 Mar 2009 12:14:26 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ A man was driving along the road and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road and got out to see what had become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay the rabbit was dead. The driver felt so bad that he began to cry. A blonde woman driving down the road saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong. "I feel terrible," he explained. "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it." The blonde told the man not to worry. She knew what to do. She went to her car boot and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the dead rabbit and sprayed the entire contents of the can on to the rabbit. Miraculously, the rabbit came to life, jumped up, waved its paw at the two people and hopped down the road. Ten feet away the rabbit stopped, turned around, waved at the two people again, hopped down the road another 10 feet, turned, waved, and hopped another 10 feet, turned and waved and repeated this again and again until it was out of sight. The man was astonished. He couldn't figure out what could be in the woman's spray can! He ran over to the woman and demanded, "What was in your spray can? What did you spray on to that rabbit?" The woman turned the can round so that the man could read the label. http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Fri, 13 Mar 2009 12:01:31 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Desktop." Customer: "OK." Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?" http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Wed, 11 Mar 2009 17:22:29 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Political cunning should http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Wed, 11 Feb 2009 09:42:32 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb? http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Tue, 10 Feb 2009 12:45:16 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Why did the airline pilot go to see a psychiatrist? http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Mon, 09 Feb 2009 22:21:54 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ A man went into a bar after work and ordered a beer. As he started drinking his beer, he heard a female voice saying seductively, 'You've got nice hair'. The man looked all around him but couldn't see where the voice came from. A minute later he heard the same voice saying, 'You are a handsome man.' The man was really puzzled by this so he asked the barman what was going on. http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Mon, 09 Feb 2009 22:13:49 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Q. What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert? A. No thanks, I'm stuffed! http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Wed, 02 Mar 2011 18:46:50 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ What's the difference between an Inlaw and an Outlaw? http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Sun, 19 Sep 2010 20:25:41 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ A man appeared in court charged with parking in a restricted zone. The judge asked the man if he had anything to say in his defense. “They shouldn’t use such misleading signs,” said the man. http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/ Thu, 01 Jul 2010 14:09:51 GMT http://www.bigjokebook.co.uk/